The surprise was a success...I proposed to my fiancé

On Monday, July 27, I did what many etiquette mavens would frown upon.

I proposed to my fiancé.

Now, this is a little different, of course. He proposed to me first (May 7, 2009), so I pretty much knew what his answer was going to be. He had made a comment when we picked out my ring that “It’s too bad guys don’t get a diamond ring, too.” He was half-joking, but I know him well enough to hear the grain of honesty in that comment. He’s been wearing an inexpensive titanium promise ring I purchased him for Christmas 2008, so I know he’s not against wearing one.

This was after he bought me a ring (“Promise ring?” he joked. “I don’t remember making any promises!”) for my birthday in November 2008, so I knew it was serious.

I searched for months for the perfect engagement ring for him (pretty much since we bought mine). We had decided on tungsten wedding bands as they don’t scratch (his titanium ring is already scratched up quite a bit). I bugged him to pick a style of wedding band, even though the wedding is a year and a half away. I wanted to make sure his engagement ring coordinated with what he chose, but I couldn’t tell him that! I got him sized for a ring and we narrowed down our wedding band choice. Secretly, I plotted and planned, trying to find a diamond ring that was masculine, yet not too “wedding band” like. One that had a significant carat weight without being exorbitantly expensive (he’d be paranoid with an expensive ring). One from a merchant with a good BBB rating. And of course, one I could buy online, because that’s how I do things.

I finally found one at Ethan Lord Jewelers. They had a good reputation and a ring I loved at a reasonable price. I placed the order and called customer service to ensure they got the ring size I entered in the comments as there was nowhere else to choose the size. The woman was very pleasant and helpful. I received a call a few days later from a gentleman at Ethan Lord who informed the ring was on backorder, but that he would keep me updated and overnight the ring as soon as it came in (this was with free shipping to boot). A couple of weeks later I received an email that the ring was shipping out Monday, and sure thing, I received it on Wednesday, July 22. It was beautiful. It was exquisite. And there was no way I was going to be able to wait till our anniversary on August 18 to give it to him.

After we moved into our new home last week, I knew I wanted to do it soon. I wanted to propose in the kitchen of our new house, just like he did for me in our old house. So Monday night, when he got home from work, the kitchen was sparkling, dinner was ready, and I proposed to the love of my life.

He said yes!

Wedding cake Tweet

@CelestialAxis http://twitpic.com/a860z - Wedding cake we want! #wedding
10:38 AM Jul 13th from TwitPic

Simon and I were watching Phantom Gourmet the other morning and they gave rave reviews for Dessert Works in Norwood. Checked out their website and found the perfect fall cake!

Dessert Works



Gorgeous! So I can't wait to set up a meeting with them, but like with all things, it has to wait until a little closer to the wedding.

We were looking at flavors and we love the idea of different flavors for different tiers so we can have some variety. We also are going to have a dessert table so we don't need as big of a cake. Simon loves Boston Creme Pie cake, so that will be one layer. French Vanilla for another, and maybe Cappuccino for the third? We'll see.

Our overall reception is going to be hors d’oeuvres only, with one hour of passed tray appetizers, two hours of food stations, then a dessert table, accompanied by three hours of beer and wine. Catered by Wolfgang Puck Catering!

Backing up, I'm all out of order. Simon and I decided on having the wedding at the Museum of Science in Boston. We booked the d'Arbeloff suite for the ceremony and the Skyline room for the reception. They contract with Wolfgang Puck exclusively, so we had no choice there, but they seem great. They don't do cakes, so at least we can pick out anyone we want and not pay a cake-cutting fee! ;)

I've got the menu all picked out, of course, since I'm planning everything far too early. I can't wait to do tastings, but that's many months away. We went to a brunch catered by Wolfgang Puck at the museum last month and it was delicious. Waitstaff was great too, I think we're going to have a great reception with them!

So here are the rooms:

Skyline Room

d'Arbeloff Suite

And catering info:

Wolfgang Puck

Super excited to decorate this place. It is a bit plain, so I'm going to have to get creative!

Spreading the news

As soon as Simon proposed, I called my little sister Katy and asked her to be my maid of honor. She's my only sibling, and at age 21 she's pretty excited to be in my wedding. Our mother passed away four years ago and our father is not in our lives, so having her in my wedding party is very important to me.

I then called my aunt, who is my mother's only living sister (her other sister and both parents passed away from the same cancer before I was born). Aunty Rena has always been there for me, along with her husband Aaron. They have definitely been surrogate parent figures for me. I gave her the good news and then asked her to put Uncle Aaron on the line. I asked him if he would give me away, and he was honored.

Last but not least, I called my cousin Jen, who is my only female first cousin and the person whose house I had been at that night. She was thrilled as well. I was so glad to hear how much they all love Simon, though I wasn't surprised! We then spoke with Simon's mother, whom he had consulted before popping the question. She was so happy for us!

Over a bottle of champagne, Simon and I began to discuss a wedding date. We both absolutely love the autumn, and decided this autumn was too soon as we were in the middle of selling his condo and buying a house together (yes, we started planning the house before the engagement!). So fall of 2010 it was, and we decided on October, as my sister's birthday is in September and mine is in November.

That was about all we could plan the first night, and Simon had to keep telling me to slow down, we have a year and a half! All my life I've dreamed of my wedding, and now that it was real, I found myself changing my mind about everything I had thought I wanted. I didn't want a casual beach BBQ wedding. I didn't want a medieval wedding. I wanted something simple and elegant and fall-themed.

And so the planning began!

The proposal

I was having dinner at my cousin's house with my aunt and sister on May 7, 2009, where I went directly after work. Unbeknown to me, Simon took the day off from work to set up the scene. He purchased a necklace from Things Remembered with our names and the engagement date. Then he purchased 6 dozen roses. He cleaned the condo, and set up the roses in vases around the main floor.

When I got home, Simon met me outside with an umbrella and escorted me in. "I have a surprise for you," he stated. I asked, "Oh, is it upstairs?" Simon responded with, "Yeah, I cleaned." I was psyched and walked into the clean living room. I spotted a single white rose in a vase and commented on what a nice touch it made.

Then I turned into the kitchen, where there were three more vases overflowing with red, pink, and white roses. I will always remember the next words out of my mouth: "Holy sh*t honey, what's up with all the roses?"

I noticed on the kitchen table was a puzzle of a picture of the two of us that I had given Simon last month. He had put it together except for two pieces, one on each of our faces. It started to hit me what was going on. I turned around to face Simon...

"These past two years have been the best two years of my life. I don't want it to end." He knelt down and spoke those magical words, "Will you marry me?"

I freaked and started trying to pull my promise ring off to make room for the ring, but he stopped me and explained he bought something else for now, and we could shop for the ring together. He opened an engraved silver box that contained a heart necklace with our names and the date, 5/7/09, engraved on it. I finally got my wits about me and said, "Yes!"

Then I finished the puzzle he had left the two pieces out of, and he put the necklace on me. We celebrated with champagne, and I began calling everyone who needed to know!