I know, AGAIN with the wedding dresses, but...thoughts?

At least I’m not really changing my mind again!  I just think this dress:

…is the closest to what I’ve been looking for; white lace, short train, sweetheart strapless neckline.  Perfect!  And only $189!  I’m in love…again

This time though, I’m waiting.  Why?  Because I finally started losing weight!  I’m down almost 9 lbs. already, and it’s been steady and healthy.  Simon and I are doing it together, and it’s really working.  We’re using SparkPeople.com, something everyone who wants to be healthy should check out!

If you do join, be sure to say CelestialAxis referred you.  ;)  It’s based on healthy lifestyle changes instead of dieting, and community support instead of being told what you’re doing wrong.  My SparkFriends are always there for me, with encouragement and virtual hugs.  You can also follow @SparkPeople on Twitter.  And the site is completely free!

It finally hit me on New Year’s Eve…I’m getting married THIS year.  Not in a year and a half, not in a year, not in 10 months.  Nine short months, THIS year.  I’d been trying on and off to lose weight for the wedding, then kept falling off the wagon with the excuse of “I have plenty of time.”  Well, now I don’t.  Not only do I want to look good in my wedding pictures, I want to start a healthier life and have energy for our eventual child.  When it finally clicked, suddenly it wasn’t so hard any more.  I’ve been eating right and exercising every day for over three weeks straight now.  It’s not a New Year’s resolution, it’s a LIFE resolution.  My BMI puts me in the obese category.  No more.

I will wear that dress, and I will look BEAUTIFUL.  I’m waiting till July to order it; it takes 3-4 weeks to arrive, leaving 2 months for alterations.  It will fit like a glove.  I will look and feel perfect!

Having my aunt and uncle and Simon's parents over today to meet for the first time!

Well, we did it. We successfully introduced the future in-laws.

Using the excuse of Simon's birthday, we had my aunt and uncle and Simon's parents over for dinner on Saturday. We cleaned all morning, and I cooked and baked all afternoon. I made chicken Parmesan, spaghetti, and salad, with a chocolate Oreo birthday cake with cream cheese frosting for dessert (my first cake from scratch!).

We put the football game on the TV, even though we both hate sports. My aunt and uncle came first (my “parents,” for those of you who don't know), and my aunt set up veggies and crackers. She brought a bouquet for me and a potted tulip for Simon's mom. She's good at this stuff. My uncle watched football.

Simon's parents arrived, laden with way too many presents for Simon (they give well beyond their means, but I love them). The introductions were made, and the men settled in for football, talking about the score and various man-things. The ladies started talking about medical things, which they both work or worked in, then the conversation turned to pets, as they're all animal lovers. It was going great!

Then I served dinner, which also went very well. They devoured the cake, it was sooooooo good. Then Simon opened his presents, most of which were for me too (pot rack, garage door opener, Tupperware, yay!). We then went back to the living room, played with the cats, and talked for another hour or so. They all got along great and had plenty to talk about.

PHEW!

Yay wedding cake chosen and placed my wedding jewelry order

I am so excited to finally be DOING something with my wedding again. Simon and I visited Dessert Works in Norwood, MA on Sunday. We tasted three kinds of cake: Boston cream pie, dolce de leche, and day and night (chocolate, vanilla, and raspberry). All three were amazing, but we decided on the first two as our favorites (as in, Boston cream pie was his favorite and dolce de leche was mine, so we got both!). Based on approximately 70 guests, the cost will be around $420 including delivery. It was a bit more than I had planned on, but Simon was surprised it wasn’t higher

It will be three tiers, with dulce de leche on the bottom and Boston cream pie on the top two. Vanilla buttercream frosting with a ribbon of milk chocolate at the bottom of each tier. Ivy scrollwork in milk chocolate along the vanilla portion above the chocolate ribbon on each tier. Scattered chocolate leaves in red, orange, and yellow. It sounds PERFECT! They also give you a mini replica of the cake instead of a top tier to save. I think ours will get eaten after the honeymoon, we’re not into the one-year anniversary thing with the cake, too long!

Then I finally got all my bridesmaids’ measurement info for them, so I can order dresses, jewelry, and shoes. First is jewelry, as I’m having an artist on Etsy custom-make all of it. A total deal at $320 for all four of us. See her store here. Here are the pieces I’m ordering:



My jewelry set.



Tiara for my MoH and I. Mine will be doubled.



MoH and bridesmaids’ necklace and bracelet.


MoH and bridesmaids’ earrings.

I didn’t want pearls when I first started planning this wedding, but like all things, I started leaning towards the traditional and decided they would look lovely with our look. I’m going to try 50s-style hair and makeup on myself, so the pearls will really fit in. And of course, there’s plenty of sparkle!

So, two more things checked off the list. Love it!

(Also, happy birthday Simon! I love you sweetie!)

Sweet got responses from both furniture rental companies regarding couches for our wedding reception

Back in September, I got a comment on my wedding blog suggesting a “lounge atmosphere” for my wedding reception as we weren’t doing dancing. I wasn’t completely sold at first, but as I thought about it more, I liked it quite a bit. Since it’s just an hors d’oeuvres reception, I figure ten round tables is a little bland and unnecessary. Adding some couches and love seats will make the setting more social and comfy. I’ll still have some tables, but interspersed with the couches and perhaps some coffee tables.

I’m still not sure how the actual set-up will look, and I’m kind of nervous that I can’t give it a trial run. The closest I can do is get the measurements of everything and map it out on paper. First though, I had to check with the venue. They don’t have couches on-site, but they do allow rentals do be brought in, and the coordinator gave me a couple of companies to check with.  

That was months ago, and right during the holidays I got it in my head to email them, and of course they were closed till January 4. So I just heard back from them, and both companies are working on quotes right now. They’re Art of the Event and PBD Events.

I’m glad I’m actually comparing vendors for once. Everything else so far, I’ve chosen the first one we met with, usually with good reason; our venue, photographer, videographer, and lighting designer. I’m pretty sure the cake place we have an appointment with this Sunday will be who we go with. For the furniture rental, I have NO idea what a “good price” is, so I’m looking forward to comparing their proposals. I’m hoping this isn’t astronomical, because my original “budget” is already shot to heck. We have a good amount to work with, so I’m finding it hard to say “no” to anything. Luckily, I am saving in lots of other areas, like the dress, flowers (silk, doing them myself), and no DJ or band.

What do you all think about this? Here is the room:

http://www.mos.org/web_media/skyline.pdf

The tables will be 60” rounds. How many couches and how many tables should I do for approximately 75 guests? There will be passed hors d’oeuvres for the first hour, then two hours of hors d’oeuvres stations, and a one-hour dessert table. I think Simon and I want a small sweetheart table. Decisions!

I'll use my time at the front desk wisely: I'll work on making my wedding invites and write my TweetMyWedding blog

The wedding invite debate has been raging.  Mainly just in my head, but Simon has had some say at least.  I kept waffling back and forth between these Etsy invites:

…and these Vistaprint invites:

 

Yes, those are Maple leaves, NOT pot leaves, but apparently they look far too similar to risk putting on my invites.  Way too many people made that comment, so I gave up.  They were so PRETTY though, and in my exact wedding colors!

 

The Etsy ones are beautiful, but somewhat expensive.  I’ve been making a wedding budget on WeddingWire.com and while we have plenty to spend, I’m trying to keep it under a certain amount because, after all, it IS only one day.  I’m going to cut back on my wedding ring cost (I seriously don’t need something as elaborate as my engagement ring) and invitations is another way I can save.  Simon suggested early on making them ourselves, and it’s starting to look like a good idea.  I can customize them exactly how I’d like, make exactly as many as I need (and print more if necessary), and of course, save money.

 

I’m no artist, so I’ve been looking for some pictures online to use on them.  There are many nice ones for only $25 or $30, which I think is reasonable.  This one’s free:

http://www.genctel.com/wallpaper/autumn-season_w2298.html

Some nice, paid ones I found are:

http://www.fotosearch.com/UNC245/u29662869/

http://www.fotosearch.com/UNC243/u25277140/

http://www.featurepics.com/online/Vector-Autumn-Tree-Design-Illustrations397337.aspx

http://www.clipartguide.com/_pages/1386-0809-1911-3918.html

http://www.acclaimimages.com/_gallery/_pages/0100-0608-2315-0803.html

 

So there are lots of options out there.  I’m only going to need about 60 invitations and response cards, so I can handle this myself, right?  Right???

Cooking for the future in-laws again, wish me luck

Once again, I am playing hostess. Thanksgiving went great, and I’m up for the task of Christmas dinner now. Simon’s mother had hip replacement surgery lately, so she can’t stand in the kitchen for very long. I volunteered, and I think she’s enjoying the new arrangement. ;)

I’ve definitely been surprised at how well I get along with Simon’s family, and especially his mother. She has no daughters, and my mother passed away, so she’s taken me under her wing as her own and we’ve grown very close. We’re both into the metaphysical, gems, and Reiki. We both love animals, especially cats. We both have a sister that’s a lesbian, lol. And we both love Simon, which is most important of all.

I love knowing she truly approves of me. You hear horror stories about future MILs being awful to the bride, deeming her unworthy of her son. Or the overbearing, controlling ones, who criticize how the bride cooks or keeps house. I’ve never heard a complaint from Barbara, and she even called after Thanksgiving to tell us how much she enjoyed it. She doesn’t bug us with daily phone calls; in fact, we’ve had to assure her it’s okay if she wants to call us more often!

When I was with my ex-boyfriend and we were loosely planning on getting married (thank goodness we didn’t!), I had a very different relationship with his mother. It started out okay, but she was very needy with his time (his parents are divorced) and would constantly harp on him to come over and do things for her. When my mother died, she left us alone for maybe two days before she was harping on him to push me to send out thank-you cards! Right after the funeral! He put his foot down, she started a fight, I emailed her to explain I needed him to myself for a little while after my loss, and everything just exploded. She stopped speaking to us, then sued him for the money she had loaned him to finish college. It was a nightmare. She called me a b!tch to my face in the courtroom lobby. She was a horrid, horrid woman.

So after that experience, you can imagine how nervous I was to meet Simon’s mother! But in the two years I’ve known her now, things have only gotten better. I look forward to being a part of her family. If you ask her, I’m part of their family already!

Super weird wedding dream last night

Apparently stressing about my wedding when awake isn’t enough, I have to stress about it in my dreams too. I woke up very confused and upset after this one:

I was getting ready for my wedding and my mom was there (she had not died in my dream). She was eating something and managed to get mustard all down her front, then brushed against me and got it on the white outfit I was wearing for the wedding. For some reason I was not wearing a gown for the wedding in my dream. I was really upset and decided to walk home to change. Simon (my fiancé) went with me, and in my dream I lived in the house I used to live in with my mother and sister.

I noticed he was wearing jeans and sneakers and got mad at him for wearing them for the wedding. He said I had told him it was casual and that he could wear anything he wanted. I responded that I thought he'd at least dress up a little. We got to my (old) house and I began looking for a dress in my closet. Simon tried offering opinions but I couldn't decide on anything. The hours flew by and eventually I was 5 hours late for my wedding. Nothing seemed to be going right.

Now I've had lots of dreams like this, which I suppose is normal. I'm worried about things going wrong with the wedding since I'm mainly planning it all myself, and my dreams make the worst possible scenarios come to life. I don't have any flowers, I'm late, I have no outfit, etc. This all despite the fact that I have finished most of these things already. This is the first one with my mother in it. I miss her terribly and it makes me so sad that she's not alive to see me get married. In this dream, I was super frustrated with her clumsiness, which often happened while she was alive. She was always too slow, too stupid, too clumsy for me, and I was very hard on her for it. Luckily I started treating her much better towards the end of her life, but I still of course feel a lot of guilt.

Dreams like this, no matter how unlikely, stress me out even more. I can just imagine running late that day, the limo not showing up, some item missing in action. It will happen, I’m sure. What I’m not sure about is whether I’ll be able to keep my cool when it does. I know the advice; you can’t control everything, just go with the flow, what seems like a big deal at the time will mean nothing later. I mean, when I was a bridesmaid and we were getting the bride ready, we were all 45 min. late! And the world didn’t end!

I don’t trust myself not to freak out. I need someone to be my anti-freak-out captain. Probably either of my two bridesmaids. My sister, Maid of Honor, gets stressed as easily as I do, so the bridesmaids, both moms of young children and QUEENS of “going with the flow,” are my best choices.

Deep breaths…