Thursday, September 23, 2010

My wedding reception dress came...and I hate it.

ARGH.  Simon and I went to visit friends in Canada for the weekend, and came home on Monday night to a boat-load of wedding stress.

First, my reception dress had arrived.  Yay, right?  I excitedly tried it on…and immediately hated it.

The brown sash is too light of a brown.  The over-layer isn’t really lace, it’s sheer mesh with some floral designs and sequins.  The back is too low to wear a bra.  It looks frumpy and thick and makes me look 10 lbs. heavier.  It sucks and I won’t wear it.


So now I have yet another dress to sell on eBay.  I’m not too worried; it’s really quite pretty and unique and should sell easily, it just wasn’t right for me.  This means I now have THREE dresses to sell on eBay, since I bought and changed my mind about two others.  And while I still love my actual wedding gown, I can’t help thinking I should have bought something just a little more comfortable so I wouldn’t have to worry about a reception dress.  It’s GORGEOUS, and looks amazing on me, but it’s hot and heavy and tight.  I will not be able to eat much in it.

Back to the drawing board.  Going dress shopping ASAP, in actual stores so I can try them on.  I don’t expect to find much; white, preferably lace, dresses are rare even in summer; but I’ll do the best I can.  I’m sure I can find something…right?

So while I’m pissed about that, we worked on the other bomb that was dropped WHILE we were on vacation: Simon’s mom not making it to the wedding rehearsal.  Which, obviously, is NOT an option.

Here’s the story: Simon’s dad, Charles, comes from PA, and most of his relatives still live there.  Simon’s grandmother (Charles’s mother) is coming to the wedding, and was going to get a ride from her daughter and son-in-law, who were also attending our wedding.  Well, her son-in-law’s mother became gravely ill, and they are no longer attending our wedding.  In order to get his elderly mother to our wedding, Charles wants to drive down to PA and pick her up.  His plan is to do this the day before our wedding, Friday, and meet us all at the rehearsal.  Charles and his mother would then spend the night in a Boston hotel.
This leaves Simon’s mother, Barbara, to drive alone from CT. This wouldn’t be so much of an issue, except she is responsible for driving Simon’s brother John, and Charles and Barbara’s housemate Adam, from CT to Boston for the wedding. Their solution was for Barbara to skip the rehearsal, and have me “fill her in” on what she’s to do in the ceremony on the day of the wedding.


I’m going to be more than a little busy on my wedding day. While I love her to pieces and don’t want to start any fights, this is NOT an option.  The ONE thing I need from his family is to have both parents attend the rehearsal because they have a part and a spoken line in it.  I wrote a part in for both sets of parents because family is important to me.  Simon briefly suggested I take that part out to solve this problem, but I shot it down before he could finish the sentence.  I want the ceremony to remain how I wrote it.  Whether they’re in it or not, his parents should be there anyways!

I know it seems like this shouldn’t even be an issue, but here are the other problems: John and Adam, for various medical reasons, cannot drive themselves to Boston on Saturday.  They cannot all come and spend Friday night because Barbara has cats and John has a bird that all need to be fed.  No, no one else can do it.  NOW his parents are saying Barbara can drive up here Friday night for the rehearsal, but drive home before the dinner so she’s not doing a 2-hour drive late at night.  I also don’t like this plan, because the mother of the groom should be at the rehearsal dinner, dammit!

Simon and I have this solution: Charles picks up his mother in PA and meets us, with her, at the rehearsal.  Barbara drives herself to the rehearsal.  Charles, Barbara, and grandma all spend the night in Boston.  Simon and I hire a driver, or allow a friend to volunteer, to pick up Adam and John in CT on Saturday.  That way Adam can feed the cats and John can feed his bird Friday night.  Adam and John drive back to CT with Barbara after the wedding.  We have pitched this and are waiting for Simon’s dad to stop making excuses and agree to it.

My other issue…I don’t for a second trust that Simon’s dad can make it from PA to Boston by 5 pm on a Friday without being late.  He just isn’t reliable enough for me to be confident in him.  We have one hour to rehearse; the space is booked after us.  We cannot start late.  What if we make all these arrangements for Barbara to make it and his dad misses it?  Do you realize how PISSED I will be???

Simon and I really don’t care THAT much if his grandmother comes.  Simon barely knows her, and she and his mom do NOT get along.  This could all be solved by her just not coming.  But Charles is a momma’s boy and won’t in a million years accept that solution.  So we’re stuck.  There are SO many things that can go wrong here, and it’s still not 100% solved anyways.


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